2008: Many Failures = Great Success

I believe it is incredibly poetic that I started the year 2008 in front of my computer in Alabama and the final hours will be in front of a computer in my childhood home. I started the year unsure on so many fronts I thought it would just be easiest to stay in for the night as a subtle surrender to the crazy unknown world, however I end the year working on one of my deepest passions and 100% knowing I control my own life and I sit in front of my computer by choice.

In totality this year was so much more challenging and difficult then my greatest year of uncertainty 2006.   In 2006 I had only one goal to move down to Alabama by rugby season. I was lost in a mind of confusion and self-doubt for much of the year.  I applied for jobs in Birmingham and just sat reading, watching movies and working out, waiting for my phone to ring or e-mails to come to my inbox. Neither came because of my lack of action that was all tied into my low self-esteem. Thanks to the generosity of my uncle Ralph and aunt Trish a trail was blazed to Alabama in October of 2006.  I moved 700 miles away and made a dream a reality. I do not think it was a coincidence that less then six weeks later the idea to write a book popped into my head for the second time in my adult life. I started  writing, but by the time I had compiled 40 random pages I had convinced myself that no one cares about my college years and how I perceived them.  Between November 2006 and November 2008 I started and failed to complete seven books.  The books included two about college, a fictional character goes on his last road trip, a book about trying to figure out life, a fictional book about dating, a book I called Rathjeisms and a book about figuring out your new body once you have a disability. I just realized something, going with the biblical quote in Proverbs and the ancient Asian saying I fell 7 times before I rose to start writing  Don’t Be Afraid to Eat Soup with a Fork And Other Lessons from the Gut.
 

My biggest failure this year was I did not qualify for the 2008 Beijing Paralympics. In retrospect, I worked extremely hard, but I did not succeed because I wasn’t ready. There are so many things I am at peace with in my life that I never used to be, however training for the Paralympics was not one of them. Sure I trained 10-12 times a week meaning many days I would push up the hill to Lakeshore twice a day, but I did that out of fear of failing I did not do that out of faith. When the teams departed for Beijing in the later part of August a calmness came over me because they were on the plane and it was over.   Beijing didn’t happen, but London will.   A member at Lakeshore asked me the day after everyone departed if I planned to go to London.  For the first time ever, instead of my typical response I hope so. I said I’ll be there!  The path is still foggy  because I’m not at the level that I need to be at for either sport, but I know I will get there. 

I’ve never had much faith in myself, but it is growing thanks to a very interesting circle that has developed. I have a strong belief in God and everything good in the universe. I know a vast majority of my ideas are gifts from the universe. I wholeheartedly believe in my ideas. If God and the universe see it fit that I be blessed to be a megaphone for its glory, maybe I’m a better person then I have ever given myself credit. I’m 100% sure that this logic can be applied to anyone. All human beings are worthy and lovely creatures. Pump yourself up if you are down or bring yourself back to Earth if you think you are greater than others.

Outside of sports another weakness has been my interesting mix of social skills. With the dual purpose of getting the word out about my writing and coming to grips with my entire life I have sent out more e-mails and friend requests on facebook then ever before. In today’s day and age I realize there is no reason I must keep my thoughts to myself. If I think of someone or something there’s no harm in writing a paragraph or sentence to send out good energy in the world.   As I have previously written, thanks to John Mayer, I realize life is so much better when you “say what you need to say.”  I hope everyone out there figures out the best way for them to communicate and they find the courage to communicate freely. I cannot reiterate this enough, there is nothing special about me I just got to the point where I was fed up with aspects of my life and I realized it was completely in my control to change it.

When talking about friendship I find it very fitting to share with you my last sleeping dream of 2008. I entered a movie theater with some people, as we approach the seats they go to the last row of the theater rather than sit up front with me. I just kind of sit there baffled as I sit there alone. Before I know it the entire theater fills up with people many of which I do not know. As the last seat in the theater is filled, the movie theater morphs into a mini version of my favorite stadium in the entire world, Huff Hall. A pep rally breaks out and my greatest cheerleader for the past 8+ years my incredible friend Dave joins me in the front row and makes the entire crowd keel over in laughter thanks to the assistance of his large microphone.

This dream had some metaphors in it. Just like the ideas of frequency and music we should find people who like to sit in the same part of the theater as we do.  It is most politically correct for me to sit in the front, but I want to surround myself with people who are not embarrassed by me dragging myself to the top row.  Dave has done more fireman carries and other acts of sheer will to help me eat the soup of life then anyone. We all have our cheerleaders and people to sit next to but sometimes it takes patience and a willingness to go about your life pushing forward regardless of the circumstance.

Now it is time to thank my copious amount of supporters.  The first thank you goes out to my guardian angels. I know I have many passed family members and friends who are looking after me as well as my man Brenden Foster as vessels sent to me by the universe.

I would also like to thank the wonderful people at fiftypeopleonequestion.com It has been an honor to get to know Benjamin Reece and I look forward to getting to know the rest of the crew in 2009 and beyond. This blog and my career would not be where it is without your influence.  They are geniuses and their voice needs to be heard by the entire world.

Thanks to Judy Vorfeld, Daryn Kagan and the people at Chicken Soup For the Soul for being the first people to professionally  believe in my writing.  2008 has also been the year of the virtual friend. I have made more connections without actually meeting people then ever before. Thank you our new friendships have been an honor and  a privilege so far.  Facebook continues to amaze me and I am excited with more people joining my group every week.

Thank you to my amazing Lakeshore family, my biological family, and my entire rugby family and  all  the other brothers and sisters I have collected from Lester elementary school, Herrick Middle School, Downers Grove North,  University of Illinois, Northwestern University  Medill IMC, Birmingham and this odd and wonderful dance we call life! 

Even though I failed early and often in 2008 it was the greatest year of my life. This year I realized I 100% control my life. Speed bumps are  a certainty, but that is our chance to prove we really want something.  If anyone ever has a time of challenge, email me at chris.rathje@gmail.com  I will do my best to help. We are all in this together!

Towards the end of 2007 I met a great young director named Jared Goodman.  He asked me what I wanted to accomplish and I told him to get some real momentum going in my life. I knew if I became a more consistent person and believed in myself more I could become a force of nature.   I joked there is earth, fire, wind and Rathje. I know together we can accomplish great things.  I’ve come up with a new analogy.  Lets all get on a rocket train together. Horizontally we can bust through anything that comes, like a freight train, and vertically we’re headed to the top in a way never seen before. 

I’m really excited for 2009! In complete honesty I don’t fully believe in myself yet, but I do fully believe in my ideas. I have to succeed to show the blessings I have been given have merit.  Lets all walk together in faith, belief and love to promote positivity one step at a time.

Thanks to all the faces in the crowd that have been such wonderful support and all those blank faces in my dream that I’ve yet to meet.  We will sit together and make beautiful music with lyrics that anyone can do anything being sung often!

Thanks 2008 it has been a blast.  Hello new friend 2009, the best year yet! 

Thanks for reading!

Chris  

 

The Big Ledger

I came up with this idea about six years ago and it just popped back into my head  out of the blue today. Nothing I will be talking about has any absolute nature to it whatsoever. These statements are all just ideas.

Digest whatever you like and if it helps at all, great. I'm sure most people are aware of the concept of karma, the idea of what comes around goes around and you cannot escape the energy you create. I know the law of attraction and similar ideas are absolutely true, but I've learned they don't work in a linear fashion and at times can be hard to predict.

From my own experiences and talking to several friends on this topic it is particularly difficult when you're good to a person or group and they betray that goodness with negative actions of some kind. In my younger days there is no question I did not deal with such situations well, but learn from my mistake and meet most actions with peace, calmness and positive actions.

As part of the condition of being human, petty actions happen all the time. Find  the courage and strength  to rise above it. 

A few weeks ago I came across a beautiful song by Kanye West called Street Lights.  Throughout the song there is a beautiful metaphor about faith, taking chances and possibilities  that we don't fully understand. A lyric that is constantly repeated is "Life's just not fair" and after many days of consideration I agree with Mr. West.  Life is not fair, but it is beautiful.   In a fair system 2+2 always equals 4, but that is not how karmic math works.  Karmic math is so complex we can't fully understand it, but we must have faith in it. 

As I am putting together my next post, which will be my last of 2008 I have brought myself to tears a couple times this afternoon.  I do not cry often, my eyes have been dry for the entire fall and winter, however I can't help it when I think of Brenden Foster.  He was so much smarter then me and he didn't get the chance to be a teenager. I figure Brenden was so much better then us God needed him to work along side him in heaven

I don't understand God's big ledger in heaven, but I am thankful for the beautiful page I have been given.  There is little question that Brenden's page did not balance, but it was one of the most beautiful pages in the massive book of credits and debits.

I ask that if someone wrongs you, let it go.  Sing your song and ignore the interference.  Let somebody greater then us do the accounting and focus on accumulating credits of good that make your dreams closer or helps your fellow man.

Lets start a new math together full of love and persistence!

Thanks for reading

Chris

Merry Christmas To All!

I have had many ideas for posts brewing in my head but I do not feel many of the topics are appropriate to talk about on this wonderful holiday.  I love the Lord and am so thankful to be celebrating Jesus's birth.  I also love the joyous attitude this season creates in so many.  However the last thing I want to do is offend anyone who does not share my beliefs.  This is why I slightly prefer Thanksgiving as a holiday because it is so inclusive everyone can give thanks in their lives.

In the spirit of thanks and living I would like to repost something I originally wrote on December 2nd.  May God Bless Brenden and all the other angels in our lives we are and are not aware of.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Listen to the Genius!

I have always believed wisdom can come from anywhere. In a metaphorical sense it does not matter what the book looks like just the pearl of insight it provides the reader.

An 11 year old boy named Brenden Foster from Washington was one of the wisest people on the face of this planet. He understood more about what human potential is and should be than most people who get the privilege to stick around for 10 times his lifespan. Several days ago Brenden lost his battle with cancer. I became aware of Brenden through reports from CNN over the past several weeks and I will be forever changed.

I humbly ask you to rise above the emotions of sadness and loss. There is no question this boy was an angel on short loan to us on Earth, but I did not want to get caught up in the tragic loss. Instead I want to focus on the wisdom of this boy’s words.

I must admit I'm quite apprehensive about writing this post because I'm afraid I can't do Brenden’s genius justice. However I take solace in the fact that he would be proud of my attempt in spreading his message to help others.

Brenden caught the attention of local media after using his final wish to organize a food drive that gave sandwiches to homeless people in Seattle.

His unbelievable compassion in the middle of his own pain and suffering was the first thing that struck me when I became aware of Brenden. He was able to look at the bigger picture and realize that there were others who were suffering too and he could make a difference. He did not just focus on himself with his wish. He spread positive action to others. He also had the courage to think big. Instead of just making a few sandwiches he wanted to make 500. As people became aware of Brenden's action it inspired food drives in other cities. That is the beauty of giving or positive action you never know the trickle down effect to measure the impact of a good deed or selfless act!

His last wish was not the only thing that struck me about Brenden. His words were also genius. When asked about his life he said “I had a great time and until it’s my time I am going to continue to have a good time.”

Shouldn’t that be the attitude everyone adopts for their life?

Then Brenden was asked by the reporter what makes him sad. Instead of a cookie-cutter response that might have something to do with his own difficulties his broader and more enlightened response was “When people give up.” At 11 years old Brenden figured out what some never do and most of us struggle to remember everyday. We must always push forward no matter what obstacles might lay in our way.

I will wrap up this post with another quote from Brenden.

“Follow your dreams! Don’t let anything stop you.”

Brenden Foster, Genius

God Bless you Brenden!
Chris

Listen to the Genius!

I have always believed wisdom can come from anywhere. In a metaphorical sense it does not matter what the book looks like just the pearl of insight it provides the reader.

An 11 year old boy named Brenden Foster from Washington was one of the wisest people on the face of this planet. He understood more about what human potential is and should be than most people who get the privilege to stick around for 10 times his lifespan. Several days ago Brenden lost his battle with cancer. I became aware of Brenden through reports from CNN over the past several weeks and I will be forever changed.

I humbly ask you to rise above the emotions of sadness and loss. There is no question this boy was an angel on short loan to us on Earth, but I did not want to get caught up in the tragic loss. Instead I want to focus on the wisdom of this boy’s words.

I must admit I'm quite apprehensive about writing this post because I'm afraid I can't do Brenden’s genius justice. However I take solace in the fact that he would be proud of my attempt in spreading his message to help others.

Brenden caught the attention of local media after using his final wish to organize a food drive that gave sandwiches to homeless people in Seattle.

His unbelievable compassion in the middle of his own pain and suffering was the first thing that struck me when I became aware of Brenden. He was able to look at the bigger picture and realize that there were others who were suffering too and he could make a difference. He did not just focus on himself with his wish. He spread positive action to others. He also had the courage to think big. Instead of just making a few sandwiches he wanted to make 500. As people became aware of Brenden's action it inspired food drives in other cities. That is the beauty of giving or positive action you never know the trickle down effect to measure the impact of a good deed or selfness act!

His last wish was not the only thing that struck me about Brenden. His words were also genius. When asked about his life he said “I had a great time and until it’s my time I am going to continue to have a good time.”

Shouldn’t that be the attitude everyone adopts for their life?

Then Brenden was asked by the reporter what makes him sad. Instead of a cookie-cutter response that might have something to do with his own difficulties his broader and more enlightened response was “When people give up.” At 11 years old Brenden figured out what some never do and most of us struggle to remember everyday. We must always push forward no matter what obstacles might lay in our way.

I will wrap up this post with another quote from Brenden.

“Follow your dreams! Don’t let anything stop you.”

Brenden Foster, Genius

God Bless you Brenden!
Chris