Don't Be Afraid To Eat Soup With A Fork

This unusual saying is one of my favorite quotes of all time. A little over three years ago I was multitasking cleaning my apartment and watching the post game of a NBA game on TNT. Analyst Kenny Smith was commenting on a team's defense (which I believe was the Detroit Pistons but please do not hold me to this) when he said that the team was not afraid to eat soup with a fork. I instantly knew what he was talking about because I have been eating soup with a fork for my entire life.

Even though this is one of my favorite quotes of all time this idea lay dormant in my head for several years. (Thanks for the reminder Nicole!)

Mr. Smith later went on to expound upon his point. The team had an ugly and inefficient way of playing defense but they made the most of what they had and worked so much harder than their opponents they still came up victorious most of the time.

Based on personal observation my function level (a term used to describe the severity level of my disability) seems to be quite unique even when comparing it to other people with cerebral palsy. I am blessed to have an extremely strong upper body for stationary tasks however I have some other weaknesses such as spasms and weak legs that don't match up with my upper body ability.

Because of this I cannot walk at all but I am able to easily transfer from seat to seat and I can get anywhere I need to by crawling or dragging myself across some area. I do not pull this parlor trick out every day but I figure God gave me this ability for a reason and it is my duty to use it. I know many people who would pay a great price to be able to independently get off the ground easily. So it does not bother me to use this gift to get upstairs when there is no elevator or I cannot safely get my wheelchair through an area like a curb or snow.

I've had many people look at me oddly, make fun of me or whatever else but at the end of the day who cares? At the end of the day I was the person who got to go to the party or still made it to class or that job interview even though the elevator was broken.

No matter who you are sometimes in life you don't have all the tools you need to make your dreams come true in a way society deems appropriate. If it is a dream in your heart then make it happen even if you have to go down the path ugly and inefficiently you're still going down the path!

If two people were in a soup eating contest where one contestant used a fork and the other contestant used a spoon conventional wisdom would say that the fork contestant would have no chance but that is not true. The contestant with a fork could win but they would have to work a lot harder and they might end up looking silly and messy because the liquid would fall through the fork. At the end of the competition the fork contestant still gets the trophy if he wins regardless of what he looks like.

I encourage anyone to go after their dreams because I strongly believe God gives us everything we need to accomplish them. Sometimes it might be ugly or inefficient or socially unacceptable resulting in some spilled broth but when you chase what you really want it is nourishing regardless of the utensil you use to get to the end goal.

Thanks for reading!
Chris

Be The Ball Danny, Be The Ball

This famous Caddyshack quote has followed me for the past eight years and I thought it would be an excellent place to start discussing the topic of what I've learned through sports. (Thanks for the idea Kevin!) In future posts I will discuss other events and activities that have had a great impact on my life because I feel there are lessons in them that can apply to many people’s lives.

For this post I would like to focus on my current passion wheelchair rugby. As part of my web committee duties I came up with an idea for a section named Off The Court. I am not married to the name but the idea behind it is that people find out so much about their new lives as disabled people through the sport of wheelchair rugby. Rugby is more than some recreational or competitive activity it is a tool for learning about life.

My idea is for different players to write different first-person testimonials to show sponsors and the general public the incredible impact rugby has on people's lives.

Please accept this humble submission as an example of how wheelchair rugby has impacted my life.

1. Don’t think so much Chris!
Throughout my life I have tended to be trapped in my mind for many different reasons but a common theme is I didn't want to make mistakes. I am far from perfect in solving this insecurity but it has gotten much better. Because of rugby I realize that mistakes equate to growth and I've been able to take many more chances off the court.

2. Movement is good even if you just made mistake
I attribute this lesson all to one occurrence in rugby. When I get beat by someone who is faster than me and my teammates switches who they are defending to help me out it is my responsibility to haul ass and try to cover the person that my teammate was originally guarding. I used to be so embarrassed by this but I always pushed as hard as I could. Then towards the end of the season last year I started to notice I was able to make some positive things happen even though the movement originally began with a mistake. I know this is a lesson that can be applied to so many different things in life.

3. Score Here!
Sorry this is a Lakeshore inside joke but the point is I have realized that it is a good thing to state your intentions even if on occasion you make a complete fool of yourself. When you say what is in your heart the things you want have a way of coming true. When I fail while saying what I thought was the right thing I have a tendency to remember the lesson more vividly. I believe this can be the case anywhere on the failure scale from minor to epic proportions however for it to be most effective I have found that it is imperative to move on completely from the failure. Like stated in point number two failure is okay, it's good even, failure is a vessel for growth.

4. Learning My Body
Even though I've had my disability for my entire life I continue to learn about it and understand more on a regular basis. Rugby is the second chapter of my life that has been a great time to learn about how my body works. When I played college wheelchair basketball it allowed me to learn a great deal however because I rarely touched the ball I was not forced to learn as much. Because I get to handle the ball much more regularly in rugby it has forced me to have a better understanding of what's going on. Because of the way I breath and prepare myself to catch the ball I have a better understanding of why my limbs and trunk spasm. I am far from complete mastery of this issue however I have seen improvement in this area. Through rugby catching and pushing I have also realized that my arms and hands tend to lock up. I don't always understand what triggers it but now I have a better understanding of why my car parking skills are less than stellar and occasionally a Lean Cuisine meal ends up on the kitchen floor (don't worry I never remove the plastic cover until I am settled and ready to eat).

5. Everyone can be Batman
When I played wheelchair basketball I did not have very high self-esteem. I just saw myself as a picker who worked really hard to be mediocre. Yes I was a picker but that didn't mean I had to be the Robin to anyone's Batman. Being a leading man or woman in your own life has very little to do with the role you play and much more to do with the way you lead your life. Lead your life with confidence, work ethic and compassion and who can possibly stop you? It doesn’t matter what happened in my life that lead me to the rugby court. All that matters is we are on the rugby court together making our sport better everyday. Lets all be leaders together!

Life is a team sport and my wheelchair rugby career is no different. I would like to finish this post by thanking everyone who has helped me in my career.

A huge thank you to My Team the Lakeshore Demolition! Thanks to an amazing staff Kevin, Kris, Boo, Gary, Kevo, Joe, The Fosters, Crystal, Patti, Crystal, Trish and all the other amazing people that work at Lakeshore.

Thanks to all my amazing teammates. Thanks to former teammates Dan Buckingham, Brandon McNeil and Josh Pennington I miss being able to see you all at least twice a week. Thanks to V, Sulli, Edward, Bob-bo, Bry, and Big Will for having patience with the young crew. Thanks to Am, J and Del for having patience with me as we continue to grow together. A special thank you goes to Joel Wilmoth for not killing me or causing me serious bodily harm. :)

Thanks to my former teammates in Chicago. They gave some basketball kid a chance when he had very little knowledge of the game.

Thanks to the teams that have allowed me to be a guest player along the road so far. John Bishop, Marco Dispaltro, and the South Florida Rattlers during Knock and Roll in 2007, Team Manitoba for Windsor and Canadian Nationals in 2007, and finally my newfound boys from Nebraska and Iowa the Midwest Rugby Rebels who let me play with them in Minnesota in St. Louis this year. It was truly a selfless act to allow me to be a guest on their teams.

Thanks to everyone I have met through special rugby events like Team USQRA tryouts and Texas Thunder.

Thanks to everyone that I have worked with as part of USQRA boards. You are all wonderful people and it has been an honor. A special thank you goes to all my brothers of the web Bob, Bill, Jason, John & Don from north of the border. Thank you for having so much patience with this website newbie.

I would also like to thank all the amazing people I have met through this sport. The encouragement and knowledge I have gained from one-time strangers is incredible. It is the catalyst for why I want to start the “Off The Court” section of the website. The knowledge sharing for life that goes on is truly unique and must be praised.

So many people have given me encouragement I hate to single out just a few, but I must to prove a point. Thanks to such world class people Will Groulx, James Gumbert, Mike Whitehead, Ian Chan, Erika Schmutz, Ross Morrison and Dave Willsie for giving me unsolicited encouragement while I was in Vancouver this summer. It proves that whether we come from rival teams in the USQRA or rival countries we are all family in rugby.

Another set of special thank you must go out to my Lakeshore family. I know I would not be following my passion of writing if it wasn’t for Lakeshore and all my other rugby brothers and sisters.

Thanks to Eddie and Sulli for having to listen to me talk rugby and life more then anyone else during tournament weekends, emails and phone calls. If it wasn’t for V (the defensive machine), Eddie (my hero) and Sulli (The Man) I could not see any court time right now.

Thanks to Kevin for being my coach in not just rugby but also life. You took a chance on a fellow Illini when you didn’t have to. You set my life down an entirely different path when you enthusiastically took my phone call on October 14 2005.

A final thank you goes to Dan Buckingham and Gary Pate they have taken on the task of being my best friends while in Birmingham. They have spent more time with me off the court than anyone else. Dan has gone back to the Southern Hemisphere however I am happy to report that Gary continues to help me improve in life on a day to day basis.

Thanks for reading!
Chris

Thank You! State of the Blog and Beyond

I made the blog open to a larger audience only a few days ago and I am already humbled by the incredible response I have received. It is such a fulfilling experience to reconnect with friends from the past. I am excited that the process will continue and I will make new friends through this awe-inspiring endeavor. Everything I write is extremely valuable but it has very little to do with me. I am just a vessel for a higher calling to push forth the abundance of the world and belief in humankind individually and as a whole.

As a valued member of the community I humbly ask for your assistance as we continue to grow.

Feedback: Please let me know what you think. I would like to evolve my writing to a style that allows readers to get the most possible value out of every read.

Growth: I believe in everything I write. I know what is being said has amazing value and if you feel the same way I would be honored if you would pass it along to others who would also find it useful. I love the concept of geometric growth. If everyone who reads this passes it on to just one person our family suddenly doubles.

Technology: Please bear with me as I learn more about blog technology. I know there is so much more I could be doing as far as the look and ability to communicate. I would love to more people to become followers through Blogger technology but if you do not feel comfortable with that I will also be starting a mailing list for every time I post something new. Feel free to e-mail me at Chris.Rathje@gmail.com or through Facebook.

Support: I have been privileged to get the support of advertisers through Google. If you see an ad below one of my posts that interests could you please check out the supporting sites? Thank you very much this will allow us to grow!

Name: I do not like the fact that the blog is just my name. There is something bigger going on here but I could not encapsulate it as I started this endeavor. I know the right name for our community will come to us organically as we move along. I hope you enjoy the mottos that I have created for the community so far.

Promoting positivity one read at a time

A place where everyone is a Chief Happiness Officer

Must see posts to newcomers
In the love for growth I wanted to make sure to highlight two posts that showed the remarkable power of the human spirit. Major congratulations are necessary for the groundbreaking work of Benjamin Reece and all others involved with fifty people one question. A somber thank you goes to the angel Brenden Foster, his wonderful family and the people that made us aware of his genius.

Next Steps: Future Dreams
All I have really wanted to do for the last three years was write, but I was so full of self-limiting thoughts that no real progress was made in this area until September of this year. I am overjoyed by the positive reception I have received thus far. It gives me confidence in my dreams and forces me to push forward with those desires. I will push to make this a global movement with thousands and eventually millions of members.

However I want to also share other dreams with you so that it forces me to be accountable and make them come true.

Golden Dreams Non-Profit: a year ago almost to the day I came up with the idea to make a non-profit organization that would fill in a gap for an issue that is very near and dear to me. The US currently does not have a program like other countries that directly supports future Paralympians on their way up through the competition ladder. This results in a very difficult road for many athletes especially in certain disability categories. I strive to improve the situation but as time has gone on I realize the broader more important concept is to improve lives through the pursuit of excellence. So I would like to broaden my concept to include teaching disabled sports to developing countries and providing assistive technology to people with severe disabilities. I've done very little to make this dream a reality due to fear of the unknown. It's time to change that!

My First Book: For those of you who read my post about Memphis I hope you sensed my passion for travel! I have learned so much through seeing other parts of the world and I have decided to put the education into overdrive. Starting in the late spring or early summer I plan to travel extensively. My desired locations include but are not limited to Australia, New Zealand, Argentina, Western Europe and parts of the United States and Canada I have not seen yet. Before I depart I will compile some writings about things I've already learned through travel and I will add to it as I see more of our wonderful world!

My Sports Goals
What I'm about to share with you I feel is the most selfish thing I have written about but in accordance with my belief that dreams are planted in your heart for a reason I must continue to stay true to myself. My short-term goal is to do whatever I possibly can to help my beloved Lakeshore Demolition to grow, learn and improve culminating in a national championship this season. My long-term goal is to represent the United States in the Paralympics in 2012 and 2016. There is a part of me that is embarrassed to write this down let alone share it because my progress as an athlete has not gone as planned. Through my hard work I see progress but I'm currently disappointed that I haven't improved more. However the dream stays firmly planted in my heart so it is my duty to move forward with the belief that it will come true.

Sorry about the length but it was an honor to share with you. I hope sharing this with you will allow us to grow stronger therefore making the world a better place.

God Bless With Love
Chris

Thoughts To Ponder

Before I get going I would like to thank Jack Canfield, Eckhart Tolle, Norman Vincent Peale, Joel Osteen and of course the Big Man upstairs! Reading their teachings has influenced this post and several others yet to come. I read a lot and sometimes where I first heard of a concept becomes muddled. I apologize in advance if I ever mistakenly attribute an idea to someone or mistakenly omit a contribution of another.

Below are some of the things that have been floating around in my head for the past few days.

Your brain is an antenna.

In accordance to the law of attraction we are all truly antennas. Whatever we have going on in our minds has a way of manifesting itself in our realities. A great example of this is several weeks ago I noticed if I was in a happy mood while driving happy songs showed up on the radio. However times where I was feeling a little blue sad songs had a way of appearing.

A little interference will not interrupt my song!

I see on reality shows all the time contestants complaining about how a bad egg spoiled the whole group’s performance, but I think there is a major error to such a viewpoint. The bad egg will only spoil the group if you let it. The environment is going to do what it does but you have full control over your reaction.

Imagine someone is driving along an empty road with perfect weather conditions and their favorite song is playing on the radio. Since the scenario is so perfect they decide to rock out to their favorite song (as well as follow all traffic laws and continue to be a responsible driver. :) Then all of a sudden the skies become grey and an annoying but bearable beeping sound accompanies their favorite song on the radio. The driver has a choice, they can continue to rock out or they can change their mood. The grey skies and less-than-perfect sounds cannot make that decision for them.

How to test your mood? Just breathe.
Over the last 18 months or so I've tried extremely hard to stay positive regardless of the environment that surrounds me. Guess what? I'm a human and sometimes I fail but through my failures I've been much more successful in reaching my goal.

A great indicator for your current mood is your breathing. Thanks to Eckhart Tolle, Jack Canfield and others I've learned a great technique. If your breathing is labored in anyway chances are you focusing on something that happened in the past or something you're worried about in the future. If you focus on maintaining or improving the present your breath will be much calmer.

Time to change the happiness battery!

I've noticed in the last few weeks I have a tendency to get melancholy when I am sitting in a room by myself. While this is happening my breath becomes slightly labored and I get a slight discomfort in my stomach. I taught myself to easily break out of this by forcing a smile. When I do this the discomfort in my stomach goes away instantly and I'm in a better mood. I envision taking out an imaginary happiness battery from my stomach and putting in a bright shiny new one that instantly perks me up. If the radio station analogy works better for you I think that would work great in this situation as well. If you find yourself down, change that radio station in your mind to happy music!

You are your own Chief Happiness Officer!

I just came up with this term yesterday but I'm already a big fan. I have learned I am in complete control of my life. If there is an activity in my life that brings me nothing but negative emotions it is up to me to change the activity or eliminate it. I am my own Chief Happiness Officer. No one else can make sure I am joyful except myself.


Thanks for reading what has been mulling around in my head for the past few days.

Have a great day and as my mother says take care of yourself because you're the only one who can!

Chris

Memphis: Life Lessons Around Every Corner!

I had the privilege to go to Memphis over Thanksgiving with my parents. I had an amazing time and wanted to share with you some things that caught my attention. (Photo Thanks to Ken Rathje)

Eat Drink Boogie Repeat.

This simple saying met us on a sign at the front desk of hotel. I couldn’t help but chuckle when I read this. The hotel made no bones about it that it was right next to the famous Beale Street. It is noisy and meant for good times full of shenanigans. The hotel clearly stated if you have a problem with the commotion don't stay there. I know the world would be a better place if people and other entities clearly stated their objective and had no apologies about it. I also appreciate a motto like “Eat Drink Boogie Repeat” because it sets up a clear road map for where Beale Street is headed.

The Peabody Ducks :

Ducks: Seen them before
Beautiful Hotel Lobby: Been in a few
Ducks in a Beautiful Hotel Lobby: I got to see this!

If you don’t know what the Peabody Ducks are and want to learn more check this out:
Courtesy of Peabody Hotel Website

The Legend of the Ducks
The tradition of the famous Peabody Marching Ducks began in 1933. Peabody General Manager Frank Schutt, an avid sportsman, and a friend Chip Barwick, returned empty-handed from weekend hunting trip in Arkansas. The two friends had a bit too much Tennessee sippin' whiskey, and decided to play a prank and put their live duck decoys (which were legal at the time) in the fountain in the hotel's Grand Lobby. Three English call ducks were placed in the fountain, and the reaction from hotel guests was nothing short of enthusiastic. Soon, five North American Mallard ducks would replace the original ducks. In 1940, Bellman Edward Pembroke, a former circus animal trainer, offered to help with delivering the ducks to the fountain each day and taught them the famous Peabody Duck March. Mr. Pembroke became the Peabody Duckmaster, serving in that capacity until his retirement in 1991. The late Mr. Pembroke's portrait hangs in the entrance to The Peabody, a luxury suite is named for him and a building in Peabody Place development is named Pembroke Square . In 2003, The Peabody Memphis conducted an extensive search for a new Duckmaster, garnering the attention of national media outlets such as CNN, the CBS Early Morning Show, and The Wall Street Journal. The Duckmaster is solely responsible for the care and wellbeing of the Peabody Ducks, including feeding, exercise, and training the teams for their daily march. Today, the ducks are housed in the "Duck Palace" on the hotel roof. Every day at 11 a.m., they are led by the Duckmaster down the elevator to the Italian travertine marble fountain in the Peabody Grand Lobby. A red carpet is unrolled and the ducks march through crowds of admiring spectators to the tune of John Philip Sousa's King Cotton March. The ceremony is reversed at 5 p.m., when the ducks retire for the evening to their palace on the roof of the hotel. The Peabody's famed ambassadors are five Mallard ducks – one drake with his white collar and green head, and four hens with less colorful plumage. The ducks are raised by a local farmer and a friend of the hotel. Each team lives in the hotel for only three months before being retired from their Peabody duties and returned to the farm to live out the remainder of their days as wild ducks.

I love that they thought outside of the box. The creativity and the darn cuteness of the ducks make for an enjoyable experience that I partook in for three days straight!

Stax: Greatness in music, a blueprint for greatness in any field.
I knew next to nothing about the Stax music label that existed in Memphis in the 60s and 70s. It hosted many top artists of the day such as Isaac Hayes and Sam and Dave. Stax’s statistics of success were remarkable. All the success was based on a solid foundation of love of their craft and a true passion to achieve greatness. The studio was a colorblind zone that only saw love for music and everyone involved. Unfortunately Stax fell victim to outside forces and had to close the doors but lets honor them by putting love into all of our actions.

Elvis what a great man!
I got the opportunity to go to Graceland. I have never been a fan of Elvis’s music and I knew very little about him but when I was educated I was very impressed with what I learned. Elvis seemed to be one of the most generous men on the planet. He understood a concept that many forget. Those who are blessed must spread their blessings and grow them.

I felt so honored to learn about Elvis. On a side note I got a big kick out of the fact that the green shag carpeting in one of the family rooms was the exact same kind that resided in my childhood bedroom. The day we visited Graceland was a very gray gloomy day. The only time the sun came out to shine was the five minutes or so I was paying my respects at Elvis’s grave. I took it as a special hello from Elvis and I'm very thankful that I received it.


St. Jude’s: The Truest Love There Is

Before I started doing research for our trip I didn't even know that St. Jude's was located in Memphis. I did not have the opportunity to go to St. Jude's but their presence was definitely felt throughout the city. The medical staff at St. Jude's saves and improves countless lives and I commend the doctors for the rock stars they truly are!

Thanks for taking the time to share my journey down Beale Street and beyond!

Have a wonderful day
Chris

Positive Growth Process

Those of you that read my last post know that Brenden Foster had a significant impact on me. He was able to take a sad event and make positive growth occur.

That got me thinking is there a process for repeating such wonderful acts and creating more positive events in this world?

I believe there is. This is a simple process I've come up with. I do not believe this process is linear. I see it more as a circular process where someone can be brought in anywhere within it and help things grow.

Knowledge: someone needs to be aware of a problem before they can fix a negative or have something prosper that did not exist before the process began.

Connection: someone needs to be connected to others to help them make their dream a reality

I strongly believe that life is a team sport. In order for us to get the most out of our individual lives we must rely on others to help us in the process.

Inspiration: that creative spark or new found passion to make something happen

Inspiration has an interesting connection to my past. When I played wheelchair basketball most of the news articles written about my teams had an inspirational human interest twist rather then looking at the teams as true athletic entities. For that reason my teammates and I grew to have distaste for “the I word” however if you look at the dictionary definitions they are quite remarkable.

Inspiration
· arousal of the mind to special unusual activity or creativity
· a product of your creative thinking and work; "he had little respect for the inspirations of other artists"; "after years of work his brainchild was a tangible reality"
· a sudden intuition as part of solving a problem
· divine guidance: (theology) a special influence of a divinity on the minds of human beings; "they believe that the books of Scripture were written under divine guidance"
· arousing to a particular emotion or action
Source: wordnet.princeton.edu/perl/webwn


Action: no one can say it better then Thomas Edison “genius is 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration.”

Without action everything else is just nice thoughts. In order for us to see positive growth in the world we must take that knowledge from our head and inspiration from our heart, find others who share our passion and make things happen.

This process is a new idea I have floating around in my head. I am looking for feedback on how I could make this idea better. In other words I would be honored if you would connect to my process!

Thanks for reading. Have a wonderful day!
Chris

Listen to the Genius!

I have always believed wisdom can come from anywhere. In a metaphorical sense it does not matter what the book looks like just the pearl of insight it provides the reader.

An 11 year old boy named Brenden Foster from Washington was one of the wisest people on the face of this planet. He understood more about what human potential is and should be than most people who get the privilege to stick around for 10 times his lifespan. Several days ago Brenden lost his battle with cancer. I became aware of Brenden through reports from CNN over the past several weeks and I will be forever changed.

I humbly ask you to rise above the emotions of sadness and loss. There is no question this boy was an angel on short loan to us on Earth, but I did not want to get caught up in the tragic loss. Instead I want to focus on the wisdom of this boy’s words.

I must admit I'm quite apprehensive about writing this post because I'm afraid I can't do Brenden’s genius justice. However I take solace in the fact that he would be proud of my attempt in spreading his message to help others.

Brenden caught the attention of local media after using his final wish to organize a food drive that gave sandwiches to homeless people in Seattle.

His unbelievable compassion in the middle of his own pain and suffering was the first thing that struck me when I became aware of Brenden. He was able to look at the bigger picture and realize that there were others who were suffering too and he could make a difference. He did not just focus on himself with his wish. He spread positive action to others. He also had the courage to think big. Instead of just making a few sandwiches he wanted to make 500. As people became aware of Brenden's action it inspired food drives in other cities. That is the beauty of giving or positive action you never know the trickle down effect to measure the impact of a good deed or selfness act!

His last wish was not the only thing that struck me about Brenden. His words were also genius. When asked about his life he said “I had a great time and until it’s my time I am going to continue to have a good time.”

Shouldn’t that be the attitude everyone adopts for their life?

Then Brenden was asked by the reporter what makes him sad. Instead of a cookie-cutter response that might have something to do with his own difficulties his broader and more enlightened response was “When people give up.” At 11 years old Brenden figured out what some never do and most of us struggle to remember everyday. We must always push forward no matter what obstacles might lay in our way.

I will wrap up this post with another quote from Brenden.

“Follow your dreams! Don’t let anything stop you.”

Brenden Foster, Genius

God Bless you Brenden!
Chris